Commonly Asked Questions About Home-Schooling
With Kelley Appleton.
Home-Schooling Mum of Five.
When I first met Kelley Appleton, she was still Kelley Salveggio, living in Connecticut with her parents and her big friendly family. It was 2007 and Dad had moved our family to America to pursue his PhD. I can’t remember the exact place I met Kelley. What I do remember was how wide and warm her smile was. She was (and is), just the sort of friend one secretly wishes for when moving to another country. Kelley is warm, beautiful, vivacious, and dripping with charm. And she showed me a kindness that I have never forgotten. Within five minutes of talking, I felt like I’d known her my whole life and I couldn’t help thinking how convenient it was to find a life long friend in a foreign country!
Move on a few years and Kelley is now living in South Carolina, home-schooling her five kids with her husband Scott. I caught up with her to get her answers to some commonly asked questions about home-schooling.
As a matter of fact, I had no idea what a commonly asked question about home-schooling looked like, so I rang up Mum (who home-schooled me and my three siblings) and got a list. Mum had been resistant to the idea of home-schooling. Years ago, when asked if she was going to take that rout to educating her children, she had said (and I quote), “ABSOLUTELY NOT! I hate schools and I would not want to ruin my home by turning it into a classroom!” (see Eating a Light-Bulb doesn’t make you bright, by Wendy Hamilton).
For Mum, the decision to home-school us had been a terrifying, pioneering act of bravery. I found out when I became an adult, that back then, Mum was convinced she was gambling with our futures. However, concern over bullying and political agendas kept her at it.
But for Kelley, herself the polished, articulate product of a home-school, the decision to educate her children herself was less traumatic. “My husband and I were both home-schooled through high school and the resulting freedom gave us the ability to study our own interests. It was something we both appreciated. We knew we wanted to home-school our children as well. Scott studied astronomy in his high school years and I taught a girl’s bible study. The freedom of time enabled me to prepare activities, events and discussions for my class. I was also able to do a lot of reading, an occupation that remains my favourite pastime.”
It's certainly a more positive attitude than Mum had! But some concerns are timeless. “For some families, public school can be helpful,” continues Kelley. “But that also comes with its own challenges. What if the school is pushing an agenda we don’t agree with? What if bullying becomes an issue? These are the other reasons we chose to home-school and continue to do so.”
I’m interested to learn how being home-schooled herself has affected Kelley’s own approach to being a home-schooling mum. Is there anything she does differently?
“I liked that we did a lot of our learning through ‘Living Books’. Instead of the usual boring layout of a textbook, these books teach history within the setting of a well told story to aid the memory. This technique is particularly popular among home-schoolers who follow the Charlotte Mason Method (British education reformer 1842 – 1923) and the Classical Education model (a system focused on the student as a whole person and that seeks to fit him/her to ultimately contribute to society in a meaningful way.) It is so much easier to remember things when they are attached to a story. Real life stories are the best way of all to learn. I don’t know that there is much I choose to do differently from when I was home-schooled. Of course, these days there are a lot more resources by way of curriculum available, so I do use different books and curriculum. But I really enjoyed my home school years and will continue to hold the baton for my own family.”
What does Kelley find challenging with home-schooling? I ask.
“Being consistent every day to do school even when the kids don’t want to or are having a bad day. Finding the balance between encouraging them to do well even though they don’t feel like it and being attentive to their needs if they need some relational time or a break. I have one child that can do 3 math pages in 20 minutes. That same child will be super squirrely on another day and sit for an hour on the same math page and I have to constantly remind him ‘focus on your work.’ I wish there was a secret to every day being a well-focused day, but I recognize that he is his own person who is thinking and growing. Some days he is more interested in helping his little sister with her math or just watching her than in doing his own. Those are the moments when I remind myself that this is the work. This is where life is happening and it’s not bad. It’s just work. Does it require patience? Oh yes! But when I remember how much I love my kid and want to see him succeed, I dig deep for the patience and God sufficiently supplies my needs. Some days that looks like “skip these 5 problems, and do those, and then you can go have some play time.” I also get to enjoy some incredibly special moments. Like getting to watch my kids learn and make connections and grow in their knowledge and abilities. I get to watch them help each other out and work together on different subjects. That’s such a blessing!”
I can’t help but notice that despite being separated by a generation and having home-schooled in separate hemispheres how similar this philosophy of Kelley’s is to Mum’s. It’s a common question among home-schooling mums. How to balance consistent education with the emotional wellbeing of the individual child? And I think that the fact this question is so prevalent in home-schooling is probably one of home-schoolings biggest strengths. As Mum writes in her book, ‘with love, prayer and support, your child can cut the cloth of his education into a perfect fit.’ (Eating a Light-Bulb does not Make You Bright.)
Finally, I ask Kelley if she has any advice for someone considering home-schooling.
“Read some books (or listen to audiobooks). I really like For the Children’s Sake by Susan Schaeffer Macaulay, Awaken Wonder by Sally Clarkson, In Vital Harmony by Karen Glass, and The Convivial Home-school by Mystie Winkler. Be sure of the ‘why’ behind your decision to home-school and also be excited about all the possibilities it opens up for you! Home-schooling is hard work, but I believe it’s the most rewarding path. I get to spend time with my kids. I get to see them learn. I get to be witness to their lives. I get to be a part of their growing up in a huge way. And home-schooling is so much more than just the book learning. Learning happens through our everyday life. I’m 7 years into my home-schooling journey with my 5 children and it is good. Challenging, but good. I’ve found that anything good usually comes through hard work; it’s true with parenting as well as home-schooling. Why not double up and do them at the same time!?”
